As you saunter into our men’s designer clothes store in San Diego or Phoenix, it’s hard to ignore her allure, seducing you from the back of the store. Confused but confident, you approach - knowing how easy it’d be to slip one on, place her on the counter, and claim it as your own.
Indeed, you’re tempted by this man purse - its taut strap hugging your chest. This is wrong, you groan internally, remembering what your friends would say. And yet...it feels right.
We’ve all seen The Hangover; felt the sting of secondhand embarrassment as Zach Galifianakis adjusts his cross-shoulder satchel while his wolfpack roll their eyes.
As a male in this modern age, the need to carry a bag is laughable, superfluous - indicative of indulgence and excess only women get away with. The want or need to condense one’s belongings into a single, more convenient package is ridiculous, absurd - can’t it all fit in your pockets? No, we’re here to say - most items of any importance can absolutely not fit in our pockets. Our business smartphone, personal smartphone, iPad, gum, and swanky headphones absolutely cannot all fit in our pockets, and we shouldn’t have to explain ourselves.
How did the briefcase devolve into a “man purse”? Why is a working man with a bag considered eccentric?
It’s really only been a few short decades since men stopped carrying bags with them regularly, we’re here to point out. Since the modern working man genuinely drives from place to place (he no longer walks or takes mass transit), we generally carry fewer supplies with us - we stash them in our cars or store them in our smart phones. Certain items, however, simply must be carried. And for this reason, my friends, we carry satchels, garment bags, and briefcases.
Cast away the cloak of shame; disregard the snickers and sneers. Embrace your satchel with appreciation and pride. My friend, I insist - there is nothing wrong with a man purse.